Lindsay Lohan

When Lindsay Lohan was sentenced to 90-days of lockdown rehab in New York as punishment for lying to the cops, it was assumed that lockdown rehab, you know, exists. But as it turns out? Eh, not so much.

If you're ever looking for Lindsay Lohan, checking the county jail is always a good place to start. Over the course of just a few years, the one-time promising actress has managed to get in trouble enough times to warrant herself six impressive publicly-released mugshots -- and even more arrests.

Looks like that heart-to-heart with Will Smith was all for naught, because Justin Bieber has taken to Instagram once again with some controversial words. Specifically that he's not going into rehab (nor does he deserve to be in rehab), that he's seen the entire world and that he's not a financial failure like Lindsay Lohan.

Lindsay Lohan continues her losing streak: a lawsuit, half of a gown and even more of the fumes that were once her self-respect. Surprise!

Lindsay Lohan was so humiliated that the world knew she was sleeping in her old teenage bedroom at mom Dina's housethat she's resorted to crashing at a friend's penthouse in New York City rent free. Because apparently that's a little less embarrassing for her. Okay.

Despite posing for photos with Lindsay Lohan and inviting her to meet his family, Max George of the Wanted is pretty much -- publicly, anyway -- completely opposed to dating her. Fair enough, considering that between the two of them the best catch is probably something that can be treated with antibiotics.

Remember how broke Lindsay Lohan is? And how 'The Canyons' pretty much doomed her to never being hired again? You do? Keep that in mind when you read the following sentence: LiLo rejected a half-million dollar deal to appear on 'Dancing With the Stars.'

Lindsay Lohan, known for making infamously fantastic life and legal decisions, is on a roll this week. Not only did she reject a rehab plea deal that would keep her -- once again -- out of jail, she also may have given walking papers to her long-suffering attorney, Shawn Holley.

Lindsay Lohan can no longer afford to pay the rent on her home and has since been evicted (or she's just relocating to New York, as her rep would have us believe) -- and you can profit from her misfortune. Of course by "profit" we mean "live in a house that reeks of lost opportunity and flop sweat."

Lindsay Lohan didn’t show up for court in New York on Monday. Shocker, we know. How’s your pulse?