DMX has gone through some dark times in his adult life, and his childhood wasn't easy either.

In an interview with GQ magazine, which was published on Monday (Sept. 23), the former Ruff Ryders MC opened up about his childhood and the pain he had to endure from his abusive mother. Despite his mom abusing him when he was a child, he still loves her.

“That doesn't mean I don't love her," X responded when the interviewer asked him if his mother abused him growing up. "That doesn't mean she's the same person. Children don't come with a fucking instruction manual. She was 20 when she had me. Four sisters; I'm the only boy. Maybe she didn't know what to do with me. I found out I just knew things that she didn't know when I was only six years old."

"I would get up at night sometimes to drink water because I was so hungry," he continued. "And I saw something in her notebook that was open on the kitchen table. And it was wrong, so I erased it. I thought I was helping. I don't know what she thought I was doing, but... I don't know if she thought I was trying to sabotage her or whatever. I don't know what she thought. But she beat two teeth out of my fucking mouth with a broom. And I think about this today, I'm like, ‘Okay, you saw me erase something in your notebook. What did you think I was trying to do? What could you have possibly thought I was trying to do?’”

Admittingly, DMX said it took him a long time to forgive his mother for the abuse, but he’s at peace now with it.

“I think a lot of people struggle with forgiving their parents," offered X. "In fact, I personally struggle with forgiving my parents. But until you learn how to forgive others, you can't forgive yourself. You can't forgive yourself if you don't know how to forgive.”

In the meantime, DMX is back to making music after recently re-signing with Def Jam. “I wanted to be a part of Def Jam since 1985, when the movie Krush Groove came out,” he told GQ. “It's going to be great.”

Watch DMX break down his iconic songs on Def Jam for GQ below.

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